Eat Cake for Breakfast

I haven't been shopping much these days (hacking away at my debt is top priority), but I couldn't resist this top from Kate Spade.

What I really need is a shirt that says "Eat Leftover Chinese Takeout for Breakfast." Admittedly, I'm doing that exact thing right now.  Don't knock it 'til you've tried it.

The Day I Tried on Wedding Gowns

Considering I've been engaged for almost a year now and *almost* have a date selected for this shindig, I thought it high time I start giving some consideration to the details. My former roommate came up to Boston for a visit last weekend, so I went ahead and scheduled an appointment at a nearby bridal salon.

Until now I've pretty much felt void of any sort of bride-to-be enthusiasm. Since my fiance and I have lived together for two years and been together for nearly ten, becoming gung-ho about planning some sort of extra-special big day feels a bit...trite? I still maintain that we keep the wedding intimate and simple (and in Boston), but that ain't happening.

So the wedding bug may have sunk its teeth into me momentarily last Sunday when I tried on dresses. It's hard not to play into the fantasy a bit when you're trying on extraordinary beautiful gowns that cost almost a year's worth of rent.

I ended up finding two that I could see myself wearing. I'm not waiting for that "this is the one" feeling to surface--a dress is a dress is a dress. If it's fabulous and looks good, I'll take it.

One of the more positive take-aways is that the samples in this particular boutique all nearly fit me spot on. The idea of being able to purchase a sample is encouraging to my wallet.

I'd post pictures of me wearing the top two contenders, but that seems a bit gauche. Here's the web image of one of my selections:

image: Liancarlo.com

Love the theatrical style. Considering the venues I'm looking into, this would be perfect. Has almost a "Swan Lake" sort of appeal.

I'm not posting a picture of the other one, because it may be the one I ultimately purchase :)

Side note: I already have the shoes!

Pipe Dreams

Lately I've been pining for the Midwest. Boston has given my fiance and I a bit of a beating recently, and the thought of running into the safe and certain (albeit boring) depths of suburban Nebraska is appealing. I'd never make it in New York.

I'm probably being slightly over-dramatic, but we've had a few shake ups.

For starters, our landlord informed us at the end of January that he'd decided to sell our place. That's never good news. Saying that we love our apartment is an understatement, and we moved in fully expecting to live here until SO completed his PhD. Now it's back to scouring Craigslist for a decent place, which is much more difficult this time around. Rents in this already costly city have increased  in the 18 months we've inhabited our current place, and most of the listings online are glorified crack dens.

Two weeks after we learned we're being kicked out of house and home, SO learned that the president's 2013 Budget Proposal completely zeros out his PhD research project. What that means for us is TBD. What it means for the future of domestic innovation is far more disconcerting.

The proposed funding cuts are by far the biggest blow. They say bad things happen in threes, though, so I'm waiting for the locusts.

I'm also trying to figure out how to make the most of my situation. I'm ready to move in a new direction with my career and have had some promising leads, but nothing has materialized. The process in itself is exhausting.

And here ends my vague tale of woe.

It all makes me want to tuck my tail and run back to carve out a life in a city that's easier to navigate (and that's closer to our families). But we're not the types to give up so easily, so we'll continue to crack at this hard nut known as Boston.

On a positive note:

• I'm paying down my credit card debt like a mo' fo.' Actually, as I'm being kicked out my home, I'm looking to sell myself out of it, too. I'm debating whether or not to sell some high ticket items, but that's a topic for another day.
• I'm looking to become certified in either Zumba or Turbokick in the next couple of months. I've only been wanting to accomplish this for about five years now, so the prospect is pretty exciting. 
• My former roommate from Richmond is coming up to visit next weekend. CANNOT wait.
• I should *probably* start planning our wedding. It'll be a nice distraction from the agony that is work.

Happy Saturday. Don't forget to flip your clocks forward tonight.
I have no clue how I'm going to peel myself out of bed come Monday morning.

"You're Your Problem, and You're Also Your Solution"

Happy New Year!

I have to say that this New Year's Eve was the best one in years. We're normally home bodies, but actually went out on Saturday night and had a really enjoyable time (complete with free hats at the bar). Can't ask for much more than that. I'm happy to say that NYE surpassed our expectations. Woot.

 

Beautiful tree at the Lenox Hotel; doing a NYE jig in my cape in the apartment lobby

Yesterday I drafted a list of everything I'd like to accomplish in 2012, which I prefer to call my "Get It Together" list.

For the past couple of months I have been in such a funk. And then there's January looming ahead with two weeks of work-related travel and all of the extra hours that go with it. I start feeling sick to my stomach just thinking about it. But see, this is my problem. I'm the problem.

We watched "Bridesmaids" the other night, and given my deflated attitude about life in general lately, Megan's line really struck a nerve:

"You're your problem, and you're also your solution."

It's time for a change in attitude. Sitting around and dwelling on the negative is only making things more unbearable. Changes need to be made this year, and while they aren't going to happen overnight, I have the power to make them happen--time to set fear aside. If nothing else comes from 2012, a change in my attitude will. I think that by simply focusing on ways to enrich my life, I'll have the extra spring in my step I've been missing.

How are you going to be your solution in 2012?

Fall Wonderland

Today was one of those spellbinding fall days in Boston--the type of day that's too beautiful to waste holed up inside. Not to sound cliche, but it was the kind of day that makes you happy just to be alive. I took a good hour this afternoon taking it all in along Commonwealth Avenue, where the leaves appear to be peaking in color. If only every day could offer such refuge. God, I love fall.

I'm a little bummed that my SO is out of town for a conference. We've been meaning to take engagement photos and today would have been the perfect opportunity. I imagine the leaves will be gone when he gets back next week. What can you do?

 

Side note: Thank you for all of your comments on my last post. I hope I didn't come off as a complete bitch, 'cause I can assure you that I'm not :)

Happy Fall.

Matters of Opinion: Those Moments When You Think Blogging is Rubbish

Now that work has released its death grip from my neck, I'm ascending from the hellish depths of whatever life was these past two months and re-entering what I like to refer to as normal people world. In normal people world, the nighttime office cleaning folks are nameless and faceless guardians who magically replace the garbage can liners instead of greeting you every night, laundry doesn't build into mountains and Blackberries see less fondling than a pair of horny teenagers left alone in the basement after a first date. 

The good thing about the past couple of of months, aside from the pay, is that I've shut out the internet almost completely. Every minute counts when there are deadlines to meet, and that leaves little time for online shopping, Facebooking and blog reading.

I've been feeling a tad lukewarm about blogging the past couple months. Before I continue, this isn't one of those dramatic "I'm kissing blogging goodbye" nonsensical/rubbish posts. More or less, I want to pose the question: do you ever feel like blogging is all a bunch of baloney? 'Cause that's how I'm feeling. But the way I feel changes by varying degrees depending on the day and the amount of wine I've consumed.


Before I go running my mouth, let me say that the one aspect of blogging I really enjoy is the opportunity to meet people in real life. Blogger meet-and-greets are great. Boston, in particular, has a solid group of people worth meeting and jibing with outside of the internet. I'm all for real-life enrichment that one can pull from the web. It's probably the only legitimate reason I can come up with for maintaining this thing.

The rest? Not so much. After stressing for weeks on end about the turnout of one of my many work-related projects and the state of my employment, I've come to the conclusion that my life is just not all that interesting. Actually, I've known that for a long time. Blogging just makes it easier to carry on in some sort of charade and pretend I'm kick ass...and believe that things like acquiring the latest Chanel nail polish color are of real-life-non-internet-popularity importance. I could play the game and pretend and try harder at this whole blogging thing (but never ever EVER Twitter), but it all feels rather forced and hardly worth the trouble.

For anyone who is actually reading this, do you feel like maintaining a blog enriches your life? Or, after awhile, does it all start to feel a little comical in the grand scheme of things?

Really, all I want these days is more sleep and less pressure in the cooker.

Thoughts?

Fall Things

For the time being, my weekends can best be compared to running virus software on a computer. By the end of the work week I'm a jumbled miserable mess full of toxins and my weekend activities serve as the sort of software that gets in there and revives me and makes me all fresh and new again. I'll save resetting the BIOS for vacation (hah! whenever that happens) or, Lord forbid, when I make a more drastic move.

But let's talk happy things like pumpkins and apple-picking and bewitchingly good times in Salem.

I'm definitely work's bitch right now, but have managed to make time on the weekend to do all of my favorite fall things. I'm hoping my current work misery is as fleeting as the fall season.

Last weekend we went up to a local orchard to pick apples...and pose by tractors, eat apple cider donuts, look at cute farm animals and generally escape the corporate/academic hell(s) that currently control our existences. 

Come back! Me want more apples!

Yesterday we continued our annual tradition of heading up to Harvard to check out the Head of the Charles Regatta or, as I like to call it, the Blue Blood Carnival.

Finally, today we trekked up to Salem for a decidedly different sort of carnival. Actually, Salem is a charming town even without all of the crazy Halloween shenanigans (don't get me wrong--I love the Halloween shenanigans!) Property up there is helluva lot cheaper in Salem than in Boston, so maybe we'll make a second home there some day. Hah...

I look at these next two images and all I see are work analogies...

And, finally, the strawberry and Nutella crepe we consumed before leaving:

Hope you all are having a festive and enjoyable fall :)

I'm crawling back into the depths of despair now.